Preheat and prep: Heat your oven to 375°F (190°C).
Lightly grease a 9x9-inch baking dish or medium casserole dish.
Crisp the bacon: In a large skillet over medium heat, cook chopped bacon until crispy, 6–8 minutes. Transfer to a paper towel–lined plate. Leave about 1–2 teaspoons of bacon fat in the pan.
Sauté aromatics: Add onion to the skillet.
Cook until soft and lightly golden, 3–4 minutes. Stir in garlic and cook 30 seconds, just until fragrant.
Brown the turkey: Add ground turkey to the skillet. Season with salt, pepper, smoked paprika, and onion powder.
Cook, breaking it up, until no longer pink and lightly browned, 5–7 minutes. Drain excess liquid if needed.
Add burger flavors: Stir in sugar-free ketchup, mustard, and Worcestershire. Simmer 1–2 minutes so the flavors meld.
Taste and adjust salt or mustard to your liking.
Make the creamy binder: In a bowl, whisk eggs, heavy cream, and cream cheese until smooth. A few small specks are okay, but aim for a mostly uniform mixture.
Assemble the casserole: Spread the turkey mixture evenly in the baking dish. Sprinkle half the cheddar and all the mozzarella over the meat.
Pour the egg-cream mixture evenly on top. Finish with the remaining cheddar and the crispy bacon.
Bake: Place on the center rack and bake 20–25 minutes, until the center is set and the top is golden and bubbling. If the top browns too fast, tent loosely with foil.
Rest and garnish: Let it rest 5–10 minutes before slicing to help it set.
Top with chopped green onions, sesame seeds, or sliced pickles for that classic cheeseburger feel.
Serve: Cut into squares and enjoy as-is, or add a drizzle of sugar-free ketchup or hot sauce for extra zing.